Why do I, or you play, that is a question I was thinking about lately. In the first place the question 'why' is perhaps too difficult to answer or wrongly formulated in the first place. I was tough by social psychologist that our brain is pretty bad in making choices beyond the difficulty of choosing a toothpaste. People make choices of course, but they seem to originate from reason, while in fact they are produced by a concept called implicite self. That part of your brain takes all you knoe, feel into account and after some time an answer or choice pops out. The question 'why' is in that sense too difficult to answer. In other words: I don't know why I play. Of course you can think of something or tell something about it, but that would be just a narrative of your mind, not the truth. The social psychologist, mentioned above, who is examening these things also told me that asking a question in that way, like: why do you love person X, makes your mind to work to come up with a narrative, but destroys in that process what really counts: the unrational thing that makes you love person X or makes you play the shakuhachi.
So I'd better not ask this question then. Better would be to ask: what do you feel when you play the shakuhachi (or seeing, talking to person X). That information is much more available in the human mind. Well what do I feel or experience? Even that is hard to descrive, but is kinda special. It is: excitement, gratification, irritation, calmness, relaxation, devotion, frustration......aaaargh! These are all things or feelings you can imagine...Why then do I play? Well: I don't know! Overall it makes me feel good.
It is a thing I want to do and that's just it.